Last night I went out on a limb and decided to go out alone. I don't usually go places I don't know (or possibly own in a psychological way) all alone. As a matter of fact, I'm sitting outside of a coffee house (inside of my car) because I don't really wanna go in as a loner. Funny thing is that I don't really care what others think. But I don't really want the pity. Which means that I kinda do care. I think I'll stop this convo now.

Anyway, so I went to Utica Square for one of those free concerts they have every Thursday. It's actually really nice since it's for families and neighbors. It was a steel band (actually the same steel band I heard two years ago and didn't like). Although I didn't think I'd actually like it, I did! I sat alone and wrote in my journal. I love to do that in a crowd with music in the background. At first it's a bit scary-like. A bit weird to be around so many people and not talk to a single one...to write in a journal instead; to converse with paper. It was awesome. At first I was reluctant and then I just couldn't stop. It was in fact invigorating really. :) SubhanAllah.


Just as I was really into what I was writing, the inevitable happened: someone interrupted me. It was someone I knew. She introduced me to some of her friends. It sure is nice to be recognized in a crowd (I'm sure my scarf was no giveaway)....

The last time I went to concerts was two years ago. It was for a class. I never knew that music could be so much fun. I never knew that there were so many places to listen to a free concert; so many places to get lost in a song. I always write in a journal when I listen. I can't help it. The music tells some story; the words tell a story; the musician tells his own story. It is so broad yet so narrow. I can't quite capture its essence.

Once I was interrupted by a guy as I was briskly writing away. He had the decency to wait until the song was over. I sat on the edge of my seat (which was a grassy ledge) at the riverside ampitheater. It was a beautiful evening; just cool enough to make it pleasant, just late enough to make it dreamy. I still remember the feeling I had. I can still feel the music. It was so powerful. I still have my notes, my thoughts. It was an amazing piece of classical music. Something about an Indian (Native American) girl (maybe a princess of sorts). It was so magical. And when it was over I was interrupted.

He was handsome and young. He was with a couple of other people. He wanted to know if I was a musician. He hit on me. I smiled politely, spoke nice enough. I walked away; surely wishing to talk more, but walking away nonetheless.

I'm stronger than I thought. Sometimes I'm wrong though. Hmm...